Everyone Hates Kendall and Kylie Jenner’s YA Novel

Kris Jenner is hell-bent on making her youngest daughters, Kendall and Kylie, as famous as their older half-sisters, and it seems like she’s succeeding. Kendall’s been pretty much embraced as a high-fashion model in spite of (because of?) her famous name. Kylie apparently has aspirations in the music industry, which we don’t doubt she will achieve, well, because she’s a Jenner. But while the fashion world has acquiesced to the Kardashian-Jenner allure, the literary world is not so charmed by the family’s efforts to insert themselves into every kind of media there is.

The sisters’ YA novel, Rebels: City of Indra has been out for three months and has sold only 13,000 copies. Maybe Kendall and Kylie’s fans aren’t the reading types — or perhaps it’s because the book is legitimately bad. Just how bad?

We combed through Amazon.com reader reviews to find out why people are saying Kendall and Kylie’s book is so terrible. And it’s not just blind Kardashian hatred — the characters aren’t complex, the plotline has been done and the writing itself is quite awful. But don’t take it from us. Let a few disgruntled readers tell you exactly how they felt about the Jenners’ authorial debut.

Max Turner: “Just finished the book and went to get some egg rolls. The fortune cookie they gave me said ‘The book you just read was terrible’ and now my egg rolls taste like regret.” 

B.D.: “The trees that died to make the paper for this book would have been better off as toilet paper.”

Barb Caffrey, writer-for-hire: “I actually rooted for the catacombs to fall on [the main characters], so I wouldn’t have to read about them any more. And I’ve *never* done that before.”

JBeazy64: “This is the literary equivalent of Derek Zoolander writing a book.”

But of all the reviews, this one is possibly the most impassioned. Luke, who called the tome “derivative trash,” basically put the nail in the coffin:

It was actually written by ghostwriter Maya Sloan, and even she couldn’t salvage the completely unoriginal premise foisted on her by a couple of spoiled teenagers. There’s a difference between writing for young adults and writing that is utterly juvenile and vapid. This is the latter in every way, a narrative mess concerning the adventures of two juvenile and vapid heroines (obviously the Jenner sisters in winking disguise) who live in a dystopian future where everyone is as juvenile and vapid as they are…

There’s a reason Dr. Seuss writes better books for 4-year-olds than 4-year-olds write for themselves. These girls seem determined to prove the same logic holds true of high-school sophomores, and Sloan is only too happy to help them prove it by cashing a paycheck to phone in a slightly spell-checked version of their stupidity. Times are hard for grown-up non-celeb novelists, I guess. I’d sooner be the Poet Laureate of Burger King than take a job grinding out this garbage…

Jenner & Jenner should stay out of novel-writing for the same reasons Stephen King should stay out of bikini modeling—though I’ll venture he’d do a far better job of crossing over careers than they have here.” Ouch.

In sum, if you were thinking of reading Kendall and Kylie’s book, you should probably save your money.

[h/t The Hollywood Gossip

 

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